Life Lessons: Double Edition

In light of my failure to update the Life Lessons for a month, I'm hittin' y'all with two quality lessons to live by.

Lesson #5

If you are breaking it off and/or escaping from a spouse/stalker, DON'T TELL THEM WHERE YOU'RE RELOCATING! Matter of fact, even before you leave, act like nothing is wrong! I ain't namin names but some of you folk just don't think. They are psycho, resourceful, and extremely determined. A lethal combination that could no doubt ruin your rep., accounts, and several communication outlets. Next thing you know you're stuck in a motel with your phone shut off, in tears, freestyling over a bottle of Hennessy. If you plannin' to get ghost do like the smart slave and yessum til they think it's okay to leave you alone. Then you run like the hounds are on you!

Lesson #6

Never trust any Reverend whose last name is Popoff. That could mean several things and none of 'em sound religious to me. Who needs church anyway, when you've got the shower and the toilet.

Always worked for me...I'm just sayin'.

Life Lessons

Lesson #5

If you're psychologically unstable...Don't do drugs. Substances don't tame the crazy, they inflame the crazy. If you wanna feel a rush do some public speaking. And if you're trying to feed your head, exercise it first.

Life Lessons

Lesson #4

Before getting drunk with friends, please, remind yourself that they are your friends. Because when you're intoxicated, perhaps you'll be too belligerent to remember, trust, or even recognize friend from foe! You might fuck around and fight a friend, tryna keep you out a fight. So either meditate on their faces, get their voices down pat, or know your limit!

(inspired by a wild night with The Girls. We were all barkin' on eachother for no reason...good times)

Life Lessons

Lesson #3

When agreeing to go on a blind date; If the person who set you up with their friend is ugly...9 times out of 10 the friend is ugly too. I mean, I'm sure he/she has a great personality, is accomplished, and has a wonderful sense of humor...just don't expect Larenz Tate to be there to great you. I'm just sayin...

Life Lessons

Lesson #2

If you don't have a friend or associate you can trust to put your stuff with in a crowded club...you shouldn't be there. There's no place to sit, have a drink, and vibe out, so what's the use?! Obviously, ain't NOBODY gonna hold you down, lol! If you're alone, best bet is to be somewhere less crowded where you can rock in oneness.

Life Lessons

Some basics I follow that help me get through the rough times. lol!

Lesson #1

Don't ever argue with an older black woman... She's got that 'Mother of the Earth' shit in her DNA B! You can't win! If all else fails, smile and nod.